psyche

That feeling is recurring more frequently now. The feeling that the entire world has to be fought. For most of my life I’ve generally believed that there are more good or at least neutral people than there are “bad” people but there are moments - for example, while witnessing acts of police brutality or watching a news report which is not-so-subtly relaying the cheery announcement that the machine is slightly more fascist than it was yesterday. I feel like I am so saturated with the false connotation of “good” and “government” that I might as well be a complete idiot.

There won’t really be anyone to turn to in the end. In the long term, things can only get worse; it is the way of the world! I’d better shape up and find a nuke bunker or a batcave or something. I am not going to think “That’d be paranoid” and end up dead in however many years.

Pax